Can Marc Hogan, a man who’s never performed stand-up comedy before in his life have a successful show at the Edinburgh Festival – all to win a £1 bet?
Well I thought the Comedy Store was terrifying. I was wrong! As part of The Amused Moose comedy course, we all have to do a 5 minute spot at the Amused Moose Comedy club.
High on the success of the Comedy Store I foolishly invite all my friends, and like the true friends they are, they’re all there, on the front row – waiting to see me cock up…But it gets worse…
I’ve had a chat with Hils Jago the owner of the Amused Moose, about producing my show in Edinburgh.
I think Hils thinks I’m crazy. It’s very rare for anybody to go on a course and 8 months later run a successful comedy show at Edinburgh. For alot of aspiring comic’s it can take years!
But if I’m funny tonight, she’ll consider it.
Great… No pressure then…
There are 11 acts on tonight, and I’m last on (I don’t know why; Logan decides the running order). Now in my feverish mind, that makes me Top Billing. It’s a bit like Oceans 11, where the credits say, “starring George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Matt Damon and Julia Roberts”….
I’m Julia Roberts!
And as we all know, Julia became famous in Pretty Woman, playing a prostitute, effectively selling herself to amuse and entertain a rich man, and here I am selling myself to amuse an audience of over 80 men (& women). But at least I don’t have to sleep with any of them….
I’m in the toilet flossing (see Pretty Woman) visualizing myself being funny, having a great gig, but I still feel a teensy bit nervous.
Music from the bar upstairs is being piped into the toilet. Suddenly Eminem’s song “Lose Yourself” comes on (you couldn’t make it up!).
It’s a sign from the Comedy Gods; Peter Cook, Dudley Moore….Rod Hull!
I’m not Julia Roberts, I’m an Irish Eminem! I mean I can’t rap, and I don’t live in a trailer but I can swear and I’m wearing a leather jacket, I can do this!!
I walk out into the Club, the 10th act is on.Ok quick sanity check:
- Learnt my lines – Check
- Cool leather Jacket – Check
- Digital Recorder, so I can listen and learn from it later – Check
- Clean underwear, just in case I die on stage – Check
I’m like a coiled spring; I’m hopping from one foot to the other like I’m doing some kind of demented River Dance.
Logan gets up, “And finally Marc Hogan”. I run onto the stage, and grab the mic.
Like a demented rabbit in the headlights I start telling jokes…
5 minutes later there’s applause, and I rush off stage. I don’t remember a thing. Luckily I’ve got a recording! All my friends come up to me and tell me I was in the top three (they have to say that, they’re my friends).
Hils approaches me with Madelaine… this is it…
“What did you think?” I squeak.
“You were quite funny”, says Hils (if I hear the words “quite funny” one more time, I’m going to kill someone).
“Oh” – This isn’t good.
“You have some potential, and Madelaine, obviously believes in you. Give me a call tomorrow.”I resist the urge to kiss and hug them both there and then!
“I will – Thank you”
I go home with Kirsty, she’s smiling at me
“I told you, you were funny.”
We get home but once again, I can’t sleep for the excitement. I’m going to have to buy some Kalms (Please note: Other sleeping aids are available).
If you would like to find out more about Marc, or to book him for a speaking event please visit www.marchoganlive.com
