December 18, 2012

Rules For The Works Christmas Do

In August 2008 Marc Hogan was bet £1 that he couldn’t become a stand up comic in less than 12 months and perform a one man comedy show at the Edinburgh Comedy Festival in August 2009 for 21 nights. He won the bet!

Is Father Christmas a non dom? I haven’t checked the tax laws of the North Pole but I suspect they must be favourable because Starbucks now gets all its coffee beans from the Arctic.

Christmas is a nightmare this year. You can’t shop online as both Google and Amazon don’t seem to pay tax, you can’t buy a coffee on the high street and if you’d like to buy a tablet computer the bitter pill is that very little money goes to the UK government. There’s nothing else for it we’re all going to have to give everyone homemade presents. So do I have to pay VAT on balls of wool?

And then there’s the Christmas party to navigate. Just how do you avoid a disciplinary the next day?

Here are Ten Rules for the Works Christmas do

1. Underwear is not an appropriate secret Santa gift
2. There is nothing festive about Christmas dinner at Nando’s
3. Bosses, do not be a scrooge.
4. Men if you must dance, please do not attempt the moves to gangnam style
5. The photocopier is for copying documents, nothing else
6. Mistletoe does not make you irresistibly attractive
7. A hug lasting more than 3 seconds makes everyone feel uncomfortable
8. Do not “peak” too soon – for at least one day of the year, carbohydrate is your
9. Never ever start a conversation with “about last month’s sales figures…”
10. And finally and most importantly, thou shalt not tag thy drunken colleagues on

Click here to watch Marc’s showreel. If you would like to find out more about Marc, visit or to book him for a speaking event please contact your favourite speaker bureau.


Follow Marc_Hogan on Twitter